Don't let others let you down

In our quest as humans to connect with others, at times we run into obstacles.

And I am sure that people run into roadblocks when they attempt to connect with me.

Life is so much about what we do with these obstacles.

Do we simply give up on others when barriers surface?

Or do we forge ahead, committed to connecting to them at all costs?

A good friend, Sarah Grieb, said to me one time, "Don't let others let you down, fight for them."

Fight for them, no matter what it takes. Let them know you are committed to connecting with them, and you are willing to breakthrough any barriers that might show up.


Imagine the feeling of someone refusing to let you let them down.

Vision and Discipline

I had struggled with discipline for almost the first 29 years of my life.

There were times in there that I was discipline, but I was in no way considered a "disciplined" person.

My desk, room, bathroom, car, life, bags, laptop bag, book bag, etc...all were very undisciplined in the fact that they were unorganized and at times messy.

And the thing that frustrated me the most was that my life was not "on point." I was not clear what I was up to each day.

Up until then, if someone would have asked me what my mission and vision statements were for my life, I would have been able to say a few things, but honestly, not with clarity, excitement, and commitment.

I realized that when my life intent is not clear and compelling. When it is not something I look at and get ecstatic about, well, then my discipline in life is lacking.

And the result of my life being clear and compelling is a number of the following things have shown up in my life in the past 2 months:

• My desk, dresser, and room have been clean nearly every night before I went to bed.
• I have blogged and average of 6 days a week.
• I have journaled 15 minutes a day, 6 days a week.
• I have planned out each day the night before.
• I have taken numerous risks that were in line with my vision.
• A handful of other disciplines.

None of these things were present until I was clear about what I was committed to and ecstatic thinking about having it happen.

If you are struggling with discipline, ask yourself, "What would it take for my mission and vision to be clear and compelling, to the point where my discipline would naturally follow?"

Have it happen

One is either committed to having it happen, or one is committed to complaining as to why it cannot happen.

"It" being the life they long to live.

Looking back on my life, I realize that at the most frustrating moments my focus was on complaining why I couldn't do it

• Make the team
• Finish the project on time
• Connect with others in unprecedented ways
• Be successful in what I was currently working on
• Etc.

...over simply committing to have it happen.

I notice that when I decide that something is going to happen (lose weight, start my own business and thrive, write a poem a week, journal everyday, have my desk be clean every night, etc.)...

My mind shifts into a new world.

My mind begins to be creatively find ways to make it happen.

One thought that someone shared with methat has helped me approach life in a new way: whenever I catch myself saying I can't do something, I ask myself, if someone would give me $10,000 if I would... (have my desk clean each night, work out 30 minutes each day, or read 20 minutes each day, etc.), could I do it?

And the answer is typically "yes."

So it is less about whether or not you can physically make it happen and more about how committed you are to having it happen.

I imagine your favorite people in the world aren't those who complain the most.

The kindle and progress

I recently purchased a kindle. I know I am a bit behind the curve on owning this amazing technology.


I wasn't sure if I would like not actually holding a physical book and being able to underline and physically write notes on the pages of the book...


I was definitely wrong about myself.


Sometimes we have to take risks, even small ones ($100 is obviously not a huge risk), to find ourselves. And at times we find out we were wrong about ourselves. Which, in this case and in many others, is full of excitement and has the potential to really broaden our horizons and possibilities for our lives.


My favorite thing about the kindle is the % progress in the bottom right hand corner. 


I rarely fall asleep reading. Rarely. 


And then last night, I kept going for 1% more, and then once I got there, I thought, how about 1% more? And I kept going until I was afraid I would fall asleep and drop my new friend, er, kindle, and it would break. So I set it down, effortlessly slipping from the book into my dreams.


I know where I am going. I am going to see the bottom right hand corner say 100%. I am so excited about the possibility of getting there that I keep pushing and stretching myself.


This is why the kindle has been so successful. It is so much like life. 


If we are clear on what our 100% is. 


If our vision is compelling and crystal clear, we will continually find ways to make it happen, no matter what it takes, at all costs.


The 100% may be big (lifetime achievement stuff)? And it may also be small - something today or even in your next conversation.


It's about having it happen rather than figuring it out.


By the way, I'm currently at 8% reading "Born to Run."

I hope you are smarter

Today, as I was reading a book while out on a beautiful walk, I had this thought about writing...

I believe that those who write should write in such a way that their writing facilitates the reader becoming smarter than the author.

I know this may seem somewhat ridiculous, considering how knowledgeable an author is about his/her subject matter.

Yet I don't think it is out of the question.

Often times when I am reading content, it is new to me. And so I have a different experience when I am reading it than the author had when writing it. Assuming that when the final draft comes out, the information is no longer new to the author.

And that unique experience that happens when interacting with the information can cause the reader to do a number of different things such as

• inspire them to read more on the subject matter
• pull the information together from different angles to get an advanced meaning from it
• pull together information from the current book with other knowledge and experience from the readers life and draw further conclusions that may be more advanced than the original author
• spark unprecedented ideas in the readers mind
• etc.

I am not sure where all of this leaves us as writers. Yet I know I would be honored if my writing in any way inspired a reader to excel in any area of life, hopefully to the point that it far surpasses where I am currently at with the content (if they have not already surpassed me prior to reading what I have to say).

Isn't that what life is all about? 

Inspiring people to be great, no matter who gets the credit.

Subvert your default

Life presents us with a variety of occurrences and events.


And then we are given the opportunity to respond to those events and even create occurrences of our own.


And when life offers us, well, day to day happenings, such as

• We take a risk and it doesn't turn out as we hoped
• We offend someone (and become aware of it after the fact)
• Our boss treats us a certain way
• There is miscommunication between friends
• Our day doesn't turn out the way we had hoped
• We receive an email that is hurtful
• Traffic
• Etc, you get the idea...

When life offers us these events, there is often a response that is what I (and others) refer to as a default response. It is the response that comes to mind first or takes precedence over other possible options.

There is just one problem with this. The default response doesn't always get us towards the vision we have for our future. At times, if we choose that default response, it will be devastating for the life we say we want. 

And so we can choose the default response. Or we can choose to creatively subvert the default. We can choose to notice where it will get us, and if it pulls us from our vision, we can choose a different response - one that is in line with the vision we say we have for our life.

And if we are committed to that vision, we will get creative. We will not be run by our default response. We will intently choose our response. And sometimes the subversive response that we choose will miss the mark as well. And we will notice, and continue to choose other creative responses until we land the one that fully enables our vision.

If you are run by your default response, it causes me to wonder if your vision is really what you say it is. Don't fool yourself. If your impact is not in line with the vision you say you want, then it is not truly your vision...yet...up until now on.

But you can choose a different future. From now on, you can choose to live in line with your vision.

If the impact is in line with your vision, you are hitting it. If it's not, you missed it. Simple as that. Then you have the chance to go again. And again. And again. Until your desired impact lands with those around you. 

Choose to subvert your default (when necessary).

A time to listen

At times in life it is good to simply listen.

To take in the perspectives of those around you.

As you can perhaps guess, I am in a brief season of that right now.

It is such a refreshing experience.

To simply listen and really take it all in.